To Be

So here’s what “present” meant today:
I practically wailed at the film festival
I almost ran away to northern Italy with Duse,
I felt the pain of my little one
Who so often sits at home and misses me.
I think of students in almost every hour
And my spouse, he’s in such disarray—
He fills my heart, then beats me down
On this and almost every day—
And I drove around for an hour
When I should have gone straight home:
I wanted to be alone and think for now
About what I have and really love,
Like him, and kin, and work–
About where the pain comes from,
And try to figure out which key
Of joy turns the locket heart
For good.

Into a well of love.

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